Humilified

Ok so those of you who know me know that I tend to make up words without really knowing it. My friend Caroline now uses my word "humilified" so I felt I might tell you about the etymology of that word.

Once upon a time (November 2009) there were two girls (Lauren and me) trying on beautiful designer clothes (at the Limited). Lauren called to me, "Ashley, please show me the gorgeous red dress that you are trying." So Ashley, dying to show off her figure to Lauren and anyone else that wanted to look, sauntered out of the dressing room showing off the very tight red cocktail dress. As Ashley is walking down to Lauren's dressing room, a store employee has an approving smile on her face as she looks at me. "I look fab and sassy!" Ashley thought. The smile on the store employee's face quickly turned into disgust as she looked down towards my feet. "It must be my chipped toenail polish," Ashley thought.

As soon as Ashley got back to the dressing room, she takes off the very tight dress, contemplating purchasing the dress. She then pulls up her panties (sorry if this is graphic for some of you), and her...HER PANTIES!!! It suddenly dawns on her. The dress was so tight that to prevent a panty line, she just...you know. She suddenly yells to Lauren, "I'm so humilified. Oh my goodness! Girl, so humilified!" She quickly dresses, runs down to Lauren's stall and tells her what she's done. She realizes why the store employee gave her such a look of disgust. She knew that she HAD to buy the dress now. She bought the dress and very quickly left the store.

Will Ashley ever be unhumilified???

Yes, that's the story. Poor Ashley. Little did she know that she was showing her skivvies to the whole store. The moral of this story is...make sure your skivvies are cute if you are going to show them to the whole store.

Tuesday's Trivia

I've decided that since I love trivia so much, I will post a new one every Tuesday. If you have any thing interesting, please share. Ask my mother if my love for trivia is for real, and she will say "fo sho." I'm just so intrigued. So here's your first one. Shall we have a ribbon cutting? hehehehahaha. ok for real.

Did you know...

If Monaco's ruling house of Grimaldi should ever be without an heir (male or female), the country will cease to be a sovereign state? No more Grace Kelly family members. Poof! Caroline, Albert, and Stephanie--ya'll better keep spitting out those kids!

Trivia Oh How I Love Thee

SO, I was talking witht the AT&T Uverse guy today (his name was Joseph), and I noticed that he had an accent. I couldn't pick up on where he was from which is abnormal because I love accents. He was asking me if it was hot in Arkansas and I told him it was your own personal sauna. Then he said he'd never experienced weather like that so then I went in for the kill. I asked him where he was from. So here's your trivia...AT&T really is worldwide because Joseph lives in the (drum roll please)...the PHILIPPINES! I know, crazy. That reminds me of my penpal, Liezel Gara. She was from the Philippines. She never sent me a cassette tape of her voice, so therefore I couldn't detect Joseph's outfit.
My time in Dallas and Tulsa was fantastic! I loved spending time with my friends. As soon as I got in Tulsa Thursday I had a little fender bender. Oh well, right? It's just money. I have a money tree as well as my brothel in the backyard. It's all good.

Yesterday I began a 12 day rapid weight loss diet. Don't worry, I'm not anorexic; I just want lean muscle. This diet requires me to eat seafood because it is so high in protein. I bought tilapia which I did ok with. I also had to buy shrimp. I had a shrimp salad today or maybe I should call it an Ashley gag salad. I could hardly get through it. THEN I had to eat cottage cheese. Luckily I got to put strawberries and blueberries in it. It still didn't help that much. I ended up throwing the rest of the cottage nasty cheese away. I feel I am gaining weight. Why is this???? We'll see how long I last. I was thinking, "I can do anything for 12 days." I really want carmel right now.

Summer lovin!.

I wish summer was year round. I absolutely love the weather, the smell of sunscreen, the lake, never having to wash your hair because the pool does it for you, and the sun not setting until 8:30. LOVE it! I'm headed to Dallas after lunch to hang out with Meredith before little Chandler arrives. I can't wait to meet my new niece!
Meredith and me at Harding graduation 2010.

As much as I love summer, it's been a bittersweet. One of my very best friends and her husband are moving to Houston on Friday. I can't tell you how many going away dinners we've had with Val just to spend time with her. I'm so happy for them and the adventure they are about to embark upon, but I will miss her dearly. Pray for Valorie and Scott and their transition. Love you both! Sarah, Valorie and me at one of the many going away dinners.

I FINALLY (dum da da dum) got a job! It makes me want to jump up and down and sing songs from Oliver Twist. For those of you who know me well, you know I love the music from Oliver Twist. I'll be a Spanish I teacher at a nearby school district. I'll be a floater which means I won't have my own classroom. There are pros and cons to that. Of course, I'd much rather have my own room. The Pro is I won't have to decorate a room. Am I nervous? YES. They use a program I've never taught with before and it terrifies me. I still haven't gone through training for that yet. All in all I'm very excited, thankful, and relieved to have a job for this coming year. And at a public school to boot! Goodbye CAC...hello savings account!

Fun times with friends at a Boom Kinetic concert.

Over and out with a little shout!

Life interrupted

God has definitely tested my roommates and me. My roommate Haleigh was attacked in our home and almost kidnapped on May 16. Haleigh has fully recovered physically, but emotionally there is still much more healing. It's just so weird to find this happening to you. Our home, the place we find so safe, so fun, so girly...those feelings were gone. It feels so much more normal for Caroline and me now. It's still strange at times to think, "Oh that's where she was laying" or "He dragged her through here." It's like we feel the pain she was going through, and the prayers she was praying. Things will never be the same. God has pulled us through as we knew he would, but we have changed. The devil acts in ways we cannot understand, but he did not win. Please continue to pray for Haleigh during these upcoming months as she gains more strength from this crisis. She will have to face the monster who interrupted her life. We still don't know when the trial will be, but I will keep you all posted. God did hand us an interruption, and we are working through it. How do you handle life's interruptions?

Since March I have cut three inches off of my hair and might possibly have a job next year. I'll find out next Friday. If that's the case I'm off to Costa Rica for a couple of days to brush up on the good espanol!

I have been babysitting every day. That keeps me very busy. I have also gotten back into reading :). I am currently reading The Birth of Venus by Sarah Dunant. Good so far. I'm reading a book a week. Trying to get in as many as I can before grad school starts July 12.

Have I ever told you what makes my world go round? Well, I'll tell you know. It's cream cheese and butter. With those things, food is so much more special. I've decided that I will never be a super model and wear bikinis in front of boys. Cream cheese and butter won't allow that!

*Spoof* Bachelor tryout video

A happy camper once again

Oh my! I've missed you blog world! I'm so glad winter is over. I really do hate it with all of my existence. I should probably move to a warmer year round climate so that I don't hate things as much. But who likes to move? Ya'll, I mean really. Could the blooming trees get any prettier? I just get so excited when spring comes. Sometimes I just want to dance in my leg warmers and video tape myself. Do ya'll ever feel like that?

Two of my best friends from college, Cali and Audra. We had to make sweet nothings of course!

Last week I went to Nashville, TN to see my best friends from college. I haven't seen them in a year so it was a wonderful reunion. We missed our other bestie Erin. Hopefully we will all be together again soon. Maybe for Cali's baby shower?? If you're reading this Erin, please say yes!

While in Nashville, I went to McKay bookstore. It's book store heaven for those of you who love to read. The picture to the left is how I feel when I'm walking in. I've been preparing my list since last May. I only spent $91 (it was better than last time)! Ya'll I just cannot tell you the happiness I feel when I enter that place. I smell books--the pages, the binding, the weird people. "Oh what joy! Oh what bliss! I feel so crazy I want to hiss!" (Another word that rhymes with hiss is piss but I didn't really want to do that. I mean, who wants to buy books with urine all over them?).
Another thing that was exciting was looking up pedafilitics (that's the fancy shmancy name for pedafiles) in my friends' neighborhoods. I have this app on my iphone called Watch Out. Type in the zip code and it gives you the name, pic and address. Cali had one that lived right around the corner from her. I won't say his name because if he googles himself then my blog will come up and then he will stalk me with his nasty medical mask on. Yes, he wears a medical mask at all times. Cali and Devin see him frequently in his yard, and he's wearing a mask. He's also wearng a mask in his mugshot. Creeper. Click here if you want to see http://www.militaryphotos.net/forums/showthread.php?149303-15-Most-Unfortunate-Haircuts-for-a-Mugshot/page2 He was charged with solicitation of a minor. He probably drives a snow cone truck. There was also one that lived three houses down from Lauren Thompson. He was charged with aggravated rape. Even more gross. If I can be of any assistance to anyone in finding out about pedafilistics, let me know. My service is free.

Go enjoy the beautiful day! Thank you God for being the smartest being out there to create such prettiness.